Dearest Bernie Sanders,

   You are a True American Hero.
You stand in the face of corruption
and, with love, simply say, "No."
You came from almost nothing
and created the spark of Revolution
in so many hearts; You turned
false claims of impossibility
into real, thriving Hope.
No matter what happens,
Dearest Bernie,
You have already won.
[LET LOVE GROW]


... My thoughts this morning of the NY primary.

Please vote for whomever you see fit but, please, do your research.

forever a beach baby

i live down-port Jefferson. i sit on my queen canopy bed and look out my bedroom window onto the boatyard and harbor. Livin the dream. i am grateful to live so close to one of the cutest parts of long island, and my favorite pastime here is walking around the village or along the coastline.  this little tidbit is the first part of my journey- walking across the street to an opening in the fence, climbing over the docks that are stored for cold weather, but somehow still staaaank. SeaWeed- now that is some Funky Fishy Smelly Green Sh*t. [interlude: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zzrh5GftgzM] I am an ocean baby tho so NBD and watching the harbor is the highlight of my day.

in this poem the fall moon-rise is symbolic of the female rising to rule spirituality:

(first draft) -alice through a looking-glass

     a Moon rising

 over the boatyard:

a small opening or gateway. followed by

a wall of docks thigh high

a need to climb, get self up, and gaze into

a field of docks, acknowledge the cleats

and the gaps . . .

aware, walk forward watching

all the dangers immediate and

necessary points of sure footing until

Your footing is sure enough and

I skip across leaping and laughing.

[. . . scents of seaweeds. . . .]

as I teeter along the edge of

        the last dock

    in My Path

          I realize I

forgot the docks would end,

forgot this sea is concrete.

with a slight singe of nostalgia eye

          lay

        unrest

        down

spot My Ladder in the lot- a trailer
protects these weak knees so I descend

and to My Joy realize I can walk on water.
______________________________

______________________________________________________________________

be

                          BE
All of those years I thought it was me
Convinced of the fear, desperate to see
Ran ocean to ocean, desperate to flee
And then there was the calming of the sea.

poetry from a younger self

some stuff i wrote in early years of undergrad .. i just want to get some stuff up to start expanding this blog, if only to practice writing for a [possibly non-existent] audience. I've always been extremely hesitant to share my writing so i need to start.

LISTENING TO THE PRIEST AT YOUR FUNERAL

I wish I could say I believed.

No fear of absolutes, just sweet God.

Security by merely having faith.

I desperately wish to be naïve,

Guided by obligations.

Then I would know you were whole—

Cold harsh reality

(that you crashed in to a wall,

became entrapped inside your car,

and all that remained was bits

of flesh from your chest)

wouldn’t be quite as aching—

I’d love to rest assured

The way I hold my hand on my heart

And pledge allegiance to the flag

That I’d never lose you.

But you are gone

And I have nowhere to turn.

____________________________

gluten-free

Been bread-free and nearly dairy-free for a few weeks now. Success!, on my way to a Paleo diet. But why does good news Feel So Sad? And Hungry? i feel like i'm breaking up with Pizza. Although i love Pizza, we just cant be together right now.  It pains me; I can't even bare to look at a pie. I already deleted all Pizza's speed-dial restaurants from my phone. I burned all the menus but my favorite one, and stashed it in my bottom desk drawer (underneath random paperwork and next to a photo of my party days). Even though i know i can't order, it makes me feel better to atleast have the number. it's like the ex-smokers who keep a spare pack, to prove their self restraint. Let me convince myself it is self-restraint (but i know it's for emergency cravings). But, Alas! For now, Pizza- Now you're just a food group that i used to know.........


Hehe. i had to......... This diet is for my Lyme or i'd be eating pizza right now.No processed sugar or much fruit, bread, or dairy... ideally, anway. i'm nowhere near there now but one step at a time. Chronic Lyme Exists, and it's damn hard to get rid of. atleast i have an excuse to switch to asian cuisine :)

Happy Valentines Day!

I've been going steady with my lover MaryJane for about 7 years and I still can't believe how happy she makes me, how creative, how alive. I'm in love I'm in love and I don't care who knows it! Today is a day for lovers, and as a romantic i'd like to pay tribute to my lover, my muse, with a [parody] sonnet. Rick James sings it well, "I'm in love with Mary Jane, She's my main thang. She makes me feel alright, she makes my heart sing." I love my girl, but, also, she's Sexy As F*ck.

_________________________________________

Reinvented Landscape

To the neglected flower in nature—

The sight of her specimen makes me drunk

With desire, for her bud is so pure.

She cloths in crystals, so lavishly funk,

Still hiding her best gems keeping demure.

Better than a rose, she smells like a skunk!

A sticky touch- I cannot fight her lure.

Other grass may be greener, but she’s a red-haired punk!

To my love, my lust, my dear Mary Jane,

I shall forever protect your esteem.

You have burned your way into my brain,

Given unto me my wildest dream.

Slow this rapid world, discern all I see;

Addiction has set me free.

______________________________

Love You Babe,
                       Al

_______________________________________________________


this was inspired in part by Michael Pollan's The Botany of Desire (i love love love this book). .... Does this make me a lesbian? ;)

Myth as Truth and Bible as Myth

               In a world where religion seems at the forefront of corruption, it can be hard to find any truth behind manipulated words. Now is not the time to discuss exploitation of religious doctrine within organized religion across the world, and I also don’t mean to step on anybody’s toes here. Actually, I believe religious doctrine has insight into some universal truth, but I think it is unfortunate it is used to promote hate. It can be confusing especially because we live in a world that likes to dismantle the stories as being implausible, and therefore untrue. Obviously the words don’t ring literal truths, but on a symbolic level they are far-reaching, and I frequently find similarities between completely un-related doctrine from the most random of cultures. Mythology is another word for religion, because people believed in these stories, just as people believe in the bible. Myths were used to explain the world without science. On a symbolic level, they describe human truths that are innate. In particular, Creation stories are similar in their birth imagery, where earth and water (feminine) meets the sky (masculine) and life is created after 7 months/days/years (a long mothafuckin’ time ago gestation—pregnant lady- was only 6 or 7 months). I will spare you that lecture and try to put it in terms that we all may be somewhat familiar with- Genesis Adam and Eve.

Adam and Eve story as a myth about human development-

            Because many of the stories in the Bible contradict each other when look at from a literal point of view, it was most likely intended to be read as a collection of favored stories; they are myths, what Campbell calls the truest of stories because they reflect and explore our inner sentiments so we can better understand our self. Since the story of Adam and Eve logically contradicts Genesis I (God creates man and woman at the same time on the 6^th day), it better reflects a myth about human development. The story of creation tells the birth of life, earth, and more specifically, when humans are born. The next story chronologically coincides with this notion; Adam and Eve is a metaphor for human growth from childhood into maturity.

            God’s relationship to Adam and Eve parallel and reflect a relationship between parents and their children. God first creates man, placing him in the Garden of Eden and providing him with comfort and food but warns him, “from the tree of knowledge, good and evil, you shall not eat,” (Genesis 2). Here God sounds like a parent telling their child not to touch the hot stove, or not to press that big red button, with pure intentions but nonetheless making it a tempting thought. God then creates woman. They live like infants in the comfort of a parent’s (God’s) house (Garden of Eden), being taken care of, fed, and running about naked without shame. 

Chapter 3 begins with the image of the serpent. The symbol of the serpent dates back to ancient times, representing nature, rebirth and the cycle of life because of the snake’s ability to shed its skin and appear as a new body. The snake speaks to woman, telling her “your eyes will be opened” for eating fruit of the tree of knowledge. The snake symbolizes the life cycle, and it is leading Eve into maturity. The fruit is sexuality- apple-like fruits are an old symbol of sensuality; Eve is on the eve of puberty. Eve remembers God’s warning, “for on the day you eat from it, you are doomed to die,” (G1). If she eats the fruit she is doomed to die because she is beginning a new process of reproduction and moving into a new stage of life. At this stage of life we develop our self consciousness, and idea borrowed from the Epic of Gilgamesh (1^st epic ever, dude) in which Enkidu (the dudeliest of dudes raised in the wilderness) is made ‘civilized’, made self conscious, by the Harlot (revered prostitute, sexy times). The references to opening eyes are not meant to be literal, but a symbol of coming into self consciousness. Adam and Eve eat the fruit, meaning they have sex, causing them know they were naked and feel embarrassed, thus a sign of coming into self consciousness.

With maturity and the end of childhood comes responsibility. God shows up and realizes what has happened. He responds by punishing snake, woman, and man. To women he gives ‘the curse’ of menstruation, which is also a sign of coming into womanhood. She becomes ruled by man, though it is she who is the giver of life for accepting the apple. Man must now work the land to eat, or work to provide for himself. When God expels Adam and Eve from the Garden of Eden, He mimics a parent telling his offspring, ‘Under my roof you will live by my rules. You want to live your own life? Go get a job and take care of yourself!’ God’s last statement, “for dust you are/ and to dust shall you return,” reflects that they are mortal, and becoming part of the reproductive cycle brings you closer to death, and certainly the death of naïve freedom from responsibility. With the knowledge of self consciousness, man and woman are left to make their own lives, and ends with a sense of individualism. Therefore, it was necessary for Eve to eat the apple for humankind to gain individuality and grow up, or else they would stay stuck in a childlike state. Hence Eve as the “giver of life”.

So what does this all mean? I don’t have an answer for you, but for me- well, I think it gives me hope. There are things in this world that are sacred, have always been and always will be. It’s beautiful, really..

[I don’t want anyone to be mistaken, I am not a Bible scholar, nor have I ever even taken a theology course, or even any sort of Bible course. However, as a literature major you come across all sorts of religion, whether it is Greek Mythology or Catholicism.]